Caramelized Asparagus

This is a quick little side that only takes 20 minutes! Hello to all my new followers p.s.!!! I’m literally blown away with how many new foodies I get to entertain! Before you know it, I’ll be on the cooking channel with my own show hahaha… First things first though, I need me a nice video camera to start puttin’ myself out on the youtube! Who wants to pay for it? ;D

Ingredients:

• a bushel of asparagus spears, fresh
• a cup or two of water
• half a small onion
• a clove of garlic
• a little butter
• dash of salt
• dash of pepper
• dash of balsamic vinegar
• squeeze of a tangerine

First I caramelize the onions and garlic, cut the hard ends off the asparagus, and throw em in the skillet! I add the balsamic vinegar, or you could use white vinegar, or any other kind you prefer! Even a nice salad dressing would go great as long as it’s oil and water based, not ranch or anything ;D I also cut the tangerine in half, squeeze em and put them cut side open on the skillet.

I cook them covered for about 15 minutes [when you see the juices evaporate, it’s time to add the water!], till they get pretty soft but not completely. And for the last five minutes I take the cover off, turn the heat on high, and char the edges for that super delicious burnt flavor.

Quick, easy, and you can do it with almost any harder vegetable; peppers, zucchini, green beans, ect.

Later food lovers!
Justin Francis Kane
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Stuffed Cucumbers with Creme Cheese Lox

Stuffed Cucumbers with Creme Cheese Lox! This was super easy, super quick, and will make your friends wanna roll over and die with refreshment. They're deliciously bite sized little orgasmic semen-splosions in your mouth.

Ingredients:

• 8 ounces of room temperature creme cheese
• 6 ounces of sour creme
• 3 ounces of fresh smoked salmon, raw and diced very small!
• a handful of chopped fresh chives, diced and small. or a shallot!
• dash of dill
• dash of salt
• squeeze of a lemon
• 1 clove of garlic, crushed and minced.
• 3 or 4 large cucumbers

So you're gonna start by mixing together everything except for the cucumbers, don't forget to taste it! You might want more dill or more lemon, who knows? Cover it and pop it in the fridge to set a little so you can pipe it into your cucumber hollows later.

Next you're going to skin your cukes! If you don't like the skin, you can take it all off. But I prefer it with a little skin on, so I did alternating strips of skin and skinless.

After that, cut your cukes into 1 inch sections removing the ends first. Once that's done, take a small grapefruit spoon or a melon baller and scoop out some but not all of the innards and seeds. You want to go down about 2/3's of the way into the flesh. Sprinkle a little extra salt on the cucumbers and set aside for a minute.

If you don't have a fancy piping bag, use a ziplock or sandwich bag! Fill it up with the creme cheese lox and cut a little small hole in one corner. Pipe it into the cukes cavities and maybe garnish with a little mini fresh sprig of dill for decoration? I only had dried, but no big deal!

Keep em in the fridge covered or serve immediately. You're friends gonna think you some fancy british tea party shit or something'!

Later Foodies,
Justin Francis Kane
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